Life

Sometimes I wonder where my life has gone. So much time has passed. Looking at the date it seems unfamiliar. 2008. As though it was a lifetime ago. Six years. A lot can happen in six years. You get older. You grow up. You leave behind your childhood. You leave behind your innocence. You realize the world isn't what you though it was. You realize not everyone is good. You lose your idealism. You lose your hope. You realize the people you love the most are the ones who will try to destroy you.

Cause

What makes people think they can take what they do not own, that they can use without permission, abuse without consent, steal without a word, without a warning?

This mentality surrounds me. I see it in simple things. A seat on the bus. A worthless possession. But it has expanded beyond these meaningless trifles, these acts of selfishness that bring nothing more than frustration.

A life. Many lives. Snatched away before their times. Innocence lost, stolen by those less innocent. No permission. No consent given. Stolen by actions compelled by a mindset that says, "I am all that matters."

The degradation of life fills this world. The depreciation of life. The desensitization of our minds. The things we tell ourselves to justify the actions of others and ourselves. A life lost because she didn't want a child is not a life.

This is depreciation: not understanding the worth of life. And thereby degrading it. Without appreciation for another's life, how can you truly appreciate your own? If you devalue life by taking it, what does this say about your own life?

It does not always relate to me. But I see it in the world around me. Is that not enough? The cause may not affect me, but the effect causes me to react.

Words

I let them destroy me.

The forces of words that come against me

Are met with the breaking of my heart.

I reply with tears instead of words.

I send out similar words at various times,

Never thinking of consequences.

At least others stand against them

And do not show outward signs

That words have crippled them,

If they do.

My defenses break.

I cannot stand against the torrents.

If I was stronger, I could conceal it.

If I was wiser, it would not be necessary.

Surely it is not with wisdom that I

Throw down the guards of my heart

To be so affected by a few syllables

Of speech.

What knowledge is there

That would convey to me that I should

Allow words to render me useless,

To render me empty?

What wisdom would advise me

To allow my emotions to reign over me,

Thereby allowing words to do so?

None I have ever heard of before,

And none shall I ever.

 10-7-13