Noises

There is more noise than you would think would be bearable, or at least be capable of being slept through. In actuality, it fills the silence, the stillness of insomnia. That lack of anything that keeps you awake at night. The water filter in the fish tank bubbles on unchecked. The fan in the window makes whatever noises fans make in a manner that is louder than any other fan I've ever been forced to sleep to. But the heat and the silence keep it on. The air was still and thick this evening, almost as though it had captured the essence of the entire week in one room in one building in one moment in time. How strangely my feelings have changed. I used to think I would be bothered that I wasn't leaving too. But what has affected me most is not my lack of finishing but their departure. The thought of a person comes to mind. A person I rarely see. I realize that is what I will miss the most. The random encounters. The "hello" in passing. I will never experience them again in the same way. The air holds the nostalgia. The fan keeps it at bay, as though it were some positive thought or some encouraging word.